I’ve Been Keeping a Secret…

I’ve been keeping a secret… one year ago today, I wrote the first words to a book I never dreamed of letting anyone else read. I had the time of my life writing it, but deep down I told myself I was crazy and weird and that I was the only one who liked dramatic, action-packed, thrilling stories. I could imagine anyone else reading it and just cringing in disgust or furrowing their eyebrows and going, “Whaaa?”

But then a month later I began to read the awful first chapter to my Floridian best friend on a bus ride during a three-day ministry expedition called The Journey with an elite ministry-training group called Next Level. I figured she’d nod and say it was nice like most people did when hearing me read my terrible writings, but… she…. loved it?


Two of my fellow Next Level members around me heard it, too, and begged me to read it louder so they could hear more. After I had read the first chapter, they told me that besides the Bible, my book was their favorite book in the world.


Flabbergasted, I began to think that maybe my book did have a future. Maybe I wasn’t the only one who liked drama and action and thrills and suspense after all. Soon, the entire bus was talking about my book – even my fellow guy Next Level members were requesting that I send it to them and asking which character I had created is the most like them! My pastor was proud that I was writing a book and asked if I could share some chapters with Next Level at a future meeting sometime, and the adult chaperones were impressed – one of them actually read some of it herself!


In the summer, I took a month-long vacation to my home, Texas, and read the 20 chapters I had so far to my BFFs there. They, too, told me that besides the Bible, my book was their favorite.


I was shocked. I couldn’t believe it. Right then and there, I decided that yes, I would finish this book I was having the time of my life writing. Yes, I would publish it, and yes, God would bless since it’s clean and God-honoring and I would even give 100% of the proceeds to world missions.

In late summer, I edited it a little bit (before knowing that you shouldn’t edit until after writing the entire first draft) and condensed a few of the chapters together, giving chapter 1 almost a complete re-write (it was bad – though nothing compared to the notorious chapter 2! *crumples to the floor in a heap of despair at the very thought of what it used to be*). After writing a couple more chapters, I had 19. By October, I shockingly realized that I had over 80k words and that it was an official novel!

I could not contain my excitement at that fact – I had never written so much in one story. I wanted to know more of what other people thought, so I enlisted my first round of beta readers (actually, since the first draft was still a work-in-progress, they were alpha readers, but I unknowingly called them betas).

My secret, seemingly crazy and weird writings were secret no longer! A huge thank you to Grace, Liz, Bella, and Blue for beta reading all 122k words of my first draft and for giving me feedback. Thank you to Loren for reading what you had time for and to Lydia, Alyse, and Daisy for signing up. And of course, thank you to my amazing real-life readers: Naomi, Sierra, Ariana, Destiny, Alena, Fortune, Allie, and Piper. (I should probably list my younger brother, too, since he is constantly giving me ideas and begging me to read him chapters with his favorite character in it and screaming at me if I write something corny or unrealistic and is demanding I give him the first copy…)

January 31, 2016 – Yikes! We’ve unleashed the beast! Excuse the messy hair and cluttered desk… I had just finished writing my first novel.

On January 31st of this year, I finished the first draft with a huge smile. It felt so surreal – I had spent ten months pouring my heart and soul into this book and had the time of my life doing so. And then there I was, finishing the first draft at 122,764 words!

Editing began at 11:45 PM that night and was a crazy process that all added to this unforgettable journey. I documented how it went from here on, but I highly advise that you don’t go and read it all. I don’t know how much of my insanity you can handle. I definitely wouldn’t want you to faint innumerably, barf four times, die twice and scream while writhing in anguish and pain the entire time you read my caps-locked updates.

I finished editing the first draft on February 28th with just one last tiny pothole to fix that I planned to do yesterday… but…

… unfortunately, at almost 11 PM last night when I researched with my mom the history I needed to know for that last plot hole, I discovered – literally – about fifty others. My entire novel and practically 50k of its entwined plot didn’t make an ounce of sense! While racking my brain for how to fix the numerous colossal potholes, the moment I would come close to plotting out the solution for one of them, another one would pop up. And then another one. And another even worse one! For a frustrated hour straight I would discover plot hole after plot hole as I tried to come up with a way to fix previous ones and tie it in to what actually happened in history. I soon had over a thousand words just in the problems I needed to fix – over half of which I now realize that with the way I planned to fix them actually would’ve created even bigger plot holes!


So much so that when I was actually discovering the plot holes, I was literally wailing random lamentations about my plot holes at 11 PM at night, complete with moaning and groaning and banging my head against my desk, to which my mom miraculously endured with patient smiles at me. I had to take a mental break and go outside and swing while listening to music (one of my favorite ways to chill) before I lost my insanity, although I’m pretty sure I’ve already passed that point a long time ago.

I came back inside at 12 AM and tackled the first chapter, then the next, then the next. I worked all the way until 4 AM this morning, when I finally decided I needed to stop after finishing chapter 17. I was so worked up about it, though, that I couldn’t fall asleep until 5 AM, so I made good use of my sleepless time and spent it in fervent prayer over everyone who has sent me prayer requests the last few days. I can truthfully say I was praying for and believing God with you guys at 4 AM this morning. ?

(Oops, I accidentally capitalized “in”. If you have an account on MyWriteClub.com, follow me! I’m MadiGrace. I’ll follow you, too, given your writings are clean and God-honoring and not devil-honoring and therefore lame. ?)

I’ve finally just finished the last of the plot holes (during which publics-schoolers came to our door and sold us chocolate – I bought a bar and was able to eat chocolate while writing / editing! I love doing that ?) and I seriously can’t wait to enlist my second round of beta readers – which I’m doing now! I’m indescribably excited about my book and cannot wait to hire illustrators, send it out to publishers, and see where God takes it.

Would you like to be a beta reader for my no-longer-secret novel?

If you don’t know what a beta reader is, I’ll tell you! A beta reader reads your work and then gives you feedback. Their feedback could be very detailed and descriptive from rewording sentences and paragraphs to deleting entire scenes or even suggesting plot changes. Or their feedback could be very broad and they simply give you what they overall thought of each chapter. Or they could peruse through the entire thing and simply spend an hour screaming at your cliffhanger at the end before dropping dead. I mean, not that anyone does that…

Once you get all the info from your beta readers, you can begin editing your work, keeping note of their suggestions.

If beta reading sounds like something you’d like to do, read on to discover more on what my novel is about!

Here is the mock cover. (As you can see, I haven’t decided on an official tagline yet. It used to be a terribly corny one that the world will thankfully never have the horrors of hearing. My beta readers deserve a gold medal for surviving it!) The mock cover looks corny and horrible, I know. Resist the urge to scream at its horribleness; you’ll need to save your breath for screaming in agony while you beta read the actual novel’s horribleness. I found this image of how the main character looks from a free background site and turned it into a cover that I’m using for now. But I’m actually going to be hiring illustrators and end up with world-class cover for it. ?

(By the way, Loyalty, Book I: Tagline TBD is the first book in the Loyalty trilogy series. So there will be a book 2 and 3 that I’m extremely excited to begin writing and have the gist of the plots for.)

Here is the very unofficial synopsis that is totally subject to change and sounds pretty bad, haha…

___My heart sank. What? I was grateful to be able to live, but swear loyalty to no one but the government? What about my loyalty to Sensei Kira? And the dead serious oath I had taken?
___I had to face the toughest decision of my entire life. With whom would my allegiance reside? Would I die loyal to Sensei Kira, who saved me from the streets as a mere orphan girl and offered me a chance at a better life? Or live under the rule of the advisors who had done nothing but offer rewards for my dead-or-alive capture?
___“What will it be, Xiang-Su?” Masatoshi demanded. “Take a mere oath and live, or die a criminal?”
___My eyes swept from Hinoki to Masatoshi. I had to make a decision, and I had to make it fast. Who would I be loyal to?

___Ari Xiang-Su, an intensively trained ninja living during the time of the Tokugawa shogunate in Japan, has to make some life-or-death decisions regarding her allegiance. It doesn’t help that her arch nemesis, a samurai warrior by the name of Hinoki Ajinomoto, continually surprises her with his questioning actions all the while she undertakes the most potentially fatal missions of her life. When allegations are made and trust is lost, Ari must once again prove her loyalty not to a single human being, but to her very faith.

I know it sounds extremely corny. ? That’s where I’m begging you to come in and help me. ?

Ari is a Christian westerner whose parents moved to Japan from the west as missionaries. Her parents died and her sensei takes her in and trains her as a ninja, but because she honors God, she doesn’t believe in murder and refuses to accept any assassination missions. Because of that very important decision… well, it’s a huge part of the plot, if you can’t tell by the end sentence of the synopsis. And I know it all sounds really corny, but my goal is for it to be exciting and thrilling and dramatic and all that stuff, and you can help me by telling me what you think of it. ?

I also set out writing my novel with the set-in-stone purpose of NOT making two characters of mine fall in love, but…


A few very important things you should know before signing up:

  • My novel does deal with ninja, samurai, and warriors, so there are some really cool, action-packed fight scenes. 😉 Well, that’s the goal for them to be really cool and action-packed, anyway. There is some violence but nothing of the extreme – for comparison, the Star Wars movies are more violent than my novel. By a lot. 😉 My youngest reader was a very mature seven-year-old who got bored of me reading it to my Texas BFFs. XD But I would definitely suggest you be at least 11 or 12. Any younger and I ask that you please ask a parent or guardian before signing up. ?
  • Of course, my novel is 100% clean, God-honoring, and totally awesome, not 100% dirty, devil-honoring, and totally lame. (There is no bad language, either. That’s lame. Two characters do have a funny, childish name-calling battle during an argument for comic relief, but the worst language is “nincompoop”. XD) It’s an epic devil butt-kicking novel, you can be sure of that!
  • Beta reading will work like this – you fill out the form below, making sure you put an email I can contact you by in the comment form (but not in your actual comment, of course. And your email is never shared). I will then send you the links and password to private pages on this blog where my chapters are located. After you read each chapter, please comment your suggestions and / or what you thought about it on that page before moving on to the next one.
  • If you sign up to be a beta reader, you will need to have read the entire novel and have commented your suggestions by anytime on April 30th, 2017. I mean, I’m not forcing you to do that, but I do begin editing the second draft on May 1st and would love to be able to know what you think about the entire thing.
  • My novel is 25 chapters and now 123,025 words long.
  • The last day to sign up is anytime on March 31st, 2017.

Would you like to help me out and become a beta reader for my novel Loyalty? I’d LOVE for you to be one! I never dreamed that one day I’d be sharing my secret, crazy writings, but God had other plans. If you’d like to be a part of them, just fill out this form and comment it below.

Name / username:
Permission granted / over 11:
Are you commenting with a valid email I can contact you by?

That’s it! I’m so very excited and I really hope you will sign up to beta read my novel Loyalty!

Even if you aren’t interested in beta reading yourself, maybe check around and see if any book-loving friends you know are. I’d love to have as many beta readers as possible to help make my novel the best it can be!

And of course, if you have any questions, well… I like questions, so ask away. 😉

Also, if you were a previous beta reader for the first draft when I had it on Delightful World of Dolls, you are totally welcome to beta read a second time, too! I’d love that!

Would you like to beta read my novel and / or know anyone who might like to?

By |2017-03-05T14:36:39-05:00March 4th, 2017|Writing|157 Comments

About the Author:

I'm Madi: blogger, writer, doll collector, and minister of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Learn more about me here and this blog here.


  1. Anika Joy March 4, 2017 at 5:20 pm - Reply


    My name is Anika Joy, yes, I am over 11 years old, and I am commenting with an email that you can use to contact me.



    • Madi March 4, 2017 at 5:58 pm - Reply

      YAAAAY! Thank you SO SO SO much for signing up! That seriously means SO much to me! I’M SO EXCITED! I’ll send you an email with the links and password as soon as I finish putting them up! *happy dance*

      OOH! That would be awesome! I like making covers for fun, too. XD If you ever make one for my book, I’d LOVE to see it! 😀

  2. From a Doll's Perspective (Anna) March 4, 2017 at 5:28 pm - Reply

    Name / username: Anna
    Permission granted / over 11: I am 11.
    Are you commenting with a valid email I can contact you by? Yes!

    • Madi March 4, 2017 at 5:59 pm - Reply

      Yay! Thank you sooo much for signing up, Anna! I’ll be sending you an email with the password and links to the chapters as soon as I’m finished putting them up! 😀

  3. Daisymermaid March 4, 2017 at 5:31 pm - Reply

    Could I try making a cover just for fun?

    • Madi March 4, 2017 at 6:00 pm - Reply

      Yes, of course! I’d LOVE to see it if you do make one! 😀

  4. Grace | The Girl Upstairs March 4, 2017 at 5:32 pm - Reply

    YAY! I am SO excited for you, Madi! I loved Loyalty and can’t wait to see the changes you make! Good luck with your novel!

    • Madi March 4, 2017 at 5:55 pm - Reply

      Thank you SO, SOOO much, Grace! I am SO excited! Oh, and I was wondering if you still wanted to beta read a second time (this time around)? I think I recall mentioning that while you were beta reading the first time and you said you wanted to (if not, please forgive my craziness XD). Just let me know if you still want to do that!

      • Grace | The Girl Upstairs March 6, 2017 at 5:29 pm - Reply

        You’re welcome, Madi! 😀

        I’d love to again, but I wasn’t sure if it was the same thing I had already read or not, since you said you haven’t begun re-writing it yet. Did you make some changes to it?

        • Madi March 6, 2017 at 5:32 pm - Reply


          I said that? Whoops… I’m not sure what I meant… I finished editing the first draft (which you wonderfully amazingly indescribably awesomely beta-read for me ?) and so now I have the second draft, which is what I’m enlisting betas for now.

          • Grace | The Girl Upstairs March 6, 2017 at 7:03 pm - Reply

            Whoops, I misunderstood. When you said “editing my second draft,” I thought you mean re-writing for some reason, and that was your first time editing. My bad! 😀 😛 XD

            I would LOVE to Beta-read, as always, but life has been super crazy with Alice shows (five in three days, phew! O_O), and trying to recover from things. So I think I’m gonna have to decline this beta-reading invitation for right now. 🙁 I will *definitely* be reading it next time you’re ready for readers! 😀

            • Madi March 6, 2017 at 7:46 pm - Reply

              LOL! So sorry I didn’t make it clearer… silly me, very silly me! ?

              Wow! Your Alice shows sound like a lot of work but SO much fun! ? You’ll do absolutely great on everything! Good luck with it all!! That’s totally fine – thank you so much for reading the first draft! I used a TON of your edits – like I didn’t consider a chapter edited unless I had looked at your suggestions first. ? Once again, best of luck with everything! ❤️

              • Grace | The Girl Upstairs March 6, 2017 at 8:15 pm - Reply

                No problem! 😛

                They are both of those things, heehee! ? Aw, thank you! It’s been a lot of fun. 🙂
                And that makes me SO happy! I’m so honored. I wish you luck with your amazing novel and can’t wait for your next reader sign-up! 😀

                • Madi March 6, 2017 at 8:26 pm - Reply

                  LOLOL! ? I wish I could see you rock the show as Tall Alice! ?
                  Aw, thank you SO much! I hope you’ll be able to do it next time! 😀

  5. Olive March 4, 2017 at 6:01 pm - Reply

    Oooh! I’m totally signing up! 😀
    Most crazily, ~Olive

    • Madi March 4, 2017 at 6:02 pm - Reply

      HURRAY! So you for sure want to beta read?

  6. Olive March 4, 2017 at 6:07 pm - Reply

    Name / username: Olive
    Permission granted / over 11: I’m older than you! 😛
    Are you commenting with a valid email I can contact you by? yep!
    I’m so excited! 😀 (I just had to tell my mom so she’d know why I’d be on the laptop so much… 😛
    Most crazily, ~Olive

    • Madi March 4, 2017 at 6:09 pm - Reply

      YAAAAY! Thank you so much for signing up! Will send you an email with the password and links as soon as I get the pages up!

      Me too! Thank you so much again! (LOLOL! ? What did she say? ?)

      • Olive March 4, 2017 at 6:16 pm - Reply

        YAY! 😀
        She said: ‘awesome!’ corrected my pronunciation of ‘beta’ and agreed that I’d probably be the screaming reader. XD btw, that racoon looks kinda creepy….and I love your book cover! 😀
        Most crazily, ~Olive

        • Madi March 4, 2017 at 6:18 pm - Reply

          LOL! My parents corrected my pronunciation of “beta” too! I was like ? *facepalm* XD Heh heh, screaming readers are awesome. ? LOL! It’s supposed to be an evil raccoon. Writing an evil plot twist. In reference to my face. I mean, not that I look like a raccoon, but, you know. XD Aw, thank you SO much! 😀

  7. Sarah March 4, 2017 at 6:16 pm - Reply

    DUDE THIS IS SO COOL. I’d love to beta! I’m Sarah (WELL DUH), I’m over 11, and you have my email, but this is the same one anyway. XD It sounds like you put a ton of work into this draft, and I’m super excited to read it! <3

    • Madi March 4, 2017 at 6:19 pm - Reply

      YAY! Thank you so so much for singing up! That means so much! ❤ I’ll be sending you an email just as soon as I finish getting the chapters up! ?

      • Sarah March 4, 2017 at 7:05 pm - Reply

        You’re so welcome! <3<3 I bet it's amazing.
        *whispers* hurry-because-i-can't-wait-to-read-it

        • Madi March 4, 2017 at 7:05 pm - Reply

          ❤️ *whispers back* Me is hurrying… ?

  8. Maddie March 4, 2017 at 7:21 pm - Reply

    Holy bananas of Babylon!!!!!! I’m so happy for you!! CONGRATS ON YOUR FIRST AMAZING (totally not lame) NOVEL!!!

    My name is Maddie (obviously… I mean if I was an Elizabeth I would have just said so) I’m 13 so yeah, over 11?And yes, you can reach me at this email!! I can’t wait to beta!!

    • Madi March 4, 2017 at 7:22 pm - Reply

      Holy bananas of Babylon – I LOVE THAT ? THAT’S HILARIOUS ?
      Thank you SOOO much, Maddie! YAY! Thank you for signing up! (LOLOL! XD) I’ll be sending you an email just as soon as I get the rest of the pages up! 😀

      • Maddie March 4, 2017 at 8:57 pm - Reply

        Haha thank you!! I’m kind of known for my crazy-last-minute-whatever-comes-to-mind- sayings ?

        No problem, I can’t wait to read it!! I’m sure it’s amazing amazing ?

        • Madi March 4, 2017 at 8:58 pm - Reply

          Oh my goodness same here (fact #100 on my bio ?) ?
          Aww, thanks so much!! ❤️ I’m STILL putting the chapters up in pages thanks to my overloaded, out-of-space, very slow computer… *glares at computer* ahem. XD

          • Maddie March 4, 2017 at 9:03 pm - Reply

            HAHA!! That’s hilarious we both have something totally random in common ? Ugh computers! What is it with you people…er… electronics… acting so slow. Like honestly guys, you’re holding the great Madi Lorfing up. So I suggest you speed it up before I have a good long hard talk with your mother[board]? Wow that was so random

            • Madi March 4, 2017 at 9:05 pm - Reply

              LOL! Right? XD Hey listen up computers! Maddie’s talking to ya! ? Hm, that was random, too…

              • Maddie March 4, 2017 at 9:11 pm - Reply

                LOL! Yeah well, we’re just random like that aren’t we? 😛 Oh well, them bananas of Babylon speak for themselves XD

                • Madi March 4, 2017 at 9:12 pm - Reply

                  That’s how we roll! ? Exactly. ?

  9. Mya March 4, 2017 at 7:42 pm - Reply

    YAY I CAN DO IT!!! 😀
    *Screams and dies*
    I am SOOOO excited to read Loyalty!
    Name / username: Mya
    Permission granted / over 11: I have parent permission and I am older than 11
    Are you commenting with a valid email I can contact you by? YES!
    I am really happy to be a part of your writing experience! When can we (The beta readers) start reading it?
    😀 😀 😀

    • Madi March 4, 2017 at 7:44 pm - Reply

      YAAAY! THANK YOU SO MUCH MYA! That means so much! I’m so excited!!
      You can get started reading as soon as you’d like! I’m just putting all the chapters up into private pages now and will be sending you an email as soon as I’m finished. Thank you SO much again! ❤️

      • Mya March 4, 2017 at 7:50 pm - Reply

        Ok, yay! I’m going on vacation during spring break (next week is my last week of school :D) so I will start reading it as soon as I can, and I will probably finish it during the 11 hour car drive!

        • Madi March 4, 2017 at 7:52 pm - Reply

          Ooh! That sounds awesome! (Aw yeah! ?) YAY! I really hope you’ll enjoy it!! 😀

          • Mya March 4, 2017 at 7:54 pm - Reply

            I’m sure I will!

  10. Olivia Bell (aka Livy) March 4, 2017 at 10:03 pm - Reply

    Aww, Maddi, this is EPIC!!! 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 I am so stoked for you, this is so exciting! Everything you said was so epic and wonderful, and I know that the Lord will bless your writings!
    I’m sorry, but I don’t think I can be a beta reader, when I read on the computer for a long time it makes my head hurt from a concussion I had skiing last year, so it would be hard for me to finish it by the end of April. 🙁 But, I am so excited to read it once it’s in print!!

    WHOOOOOHOOOOOO!!!!! Keep up the epic speed writing, Maddi! 😀

    • Madi March 5, 2017 at 11:21 am - Reply

      Thank you SOOO much, Livy!! That means SO MUCH! ??
      Aw, that’s totally okay!! That means so much that you even want to beta read though, and I really hope you’ll read it once it’s in print! Thank you SOO much again, Livy!! ❤️???

      • Olivia Bell (aka Livy) March 5, 2017 at 2:15 pm - Reply

        Of course I’ll read it once it’s in print!! Are you kidding? 😛 😛 I’ll be buying a signed copy with the Madison Lorfing signature! 😉 I can’t wait to read it! 😀

        • Madi March 5, 2017 at 4:23 pm - Reply

          Awww, thank you SO MUCH ??? I can’t wait to publish it! 😀 ❤️

  11. JasmineSierra March 4, 2017 at 10:55 pm - Reply

    YAY!! This is soooo awesome!!
    My name is AGfan and/or Jasmine, yes I am over 11 and I am commenting with an email!!

    • Madi March 5, 2017 at 11:22 am - Reply

      YAY! Thank you SO much for signing up! I’ll be sending you an email ASAP. ?

      • JasmineSierra March 5, 2017 at 11:06 pm - Reply

        Hey quick question, on the email, where is the link to the first chapter? Thanks loads, AGfan!!

      • JasmineSierra March 5, 2017 at 11:13 pm - Reply

        Haha…just figured out the link by figuring out what the link on Delightful World of Dolls site was to it and doing the same link (except different website) and it worked!! :P:P

        • Madi March 5, 2017 at 11:20 pm - Reply

          I’m so sorry, that’s actually the wrong one – the one on Delightful World of Dolls is the first draft which I’ve already edited. I sent you an email with the actual link – so sorry I forgot to send it in the first one! *facepalm*

  12. sara March 4, 2017 at 11:24 pm - Reply

    Hey madison!?
    you did a great job on you new post!
    keep up the he good work!!!!
    I’m soooooo excited for this new blog !!
    How are you!??

    • Madi March 5, 2017 at 11:23 am - Reply

      Hey Sara! Thank you SO much! That means so much, you’re so sweet!! Me too!! ?
      I am wonderful! How are you?

  13. AAG March 5, 2017 at 1:55 am - Reply

    I wanna read it but i’m 9! Darn………

    • Madi March 5, 2017 at 11:25 am - Reply

      Aw, that’s totally okay – if you want to read it and think you’re fine with ninja and samurai and warriors and (not extremely violent) fight scenes and stuff, you could ask your parents what they think and they’ll know if it’s right for you. You don’t have to be over 11, just ask your parents first if you aren’t. And like I said, my youngest reader was a mature seven year old who actually got bored of me reading it to his sisters, my BFFs. ? Thanks so much for reading this post and commenting regardless, though! ?❤️

  14. kaitlynrh1 March 5, 2017 at 9:49 am - Reply

    That’s SO COOL, Madi!!

    • Madi March 5, 2017 at 11:25 am - Reply

      Thank you SO much!! ?

  15. Izzy March 5, 2017 at 10:41 am - Reply

    Yay! Wow, this sounds AWESOME. ? I would like to beta read! My name is Izzy, I am over 11 year old, and yes, I am commenting with a valid email. I’m sew excited! I can’t wait to read it.

    • Madi March 5, 2017 at 11:26 am - Reply

      YAY! Aww, I really hope you’ll like it! Thank you SO much signing up, Izzy! I’m so excited! I’ll be sending you an email ASAP. ?

  16. Clara March 5, 2017 at 11:12 am - Reply

    Ooh, Madi, I would LOVE to be a beta reader!!! I don’t know if I’ll be able to make it through the whole book due to the fact that I’m doing a lot of school right now and we travel a lot, but I’ll do my best and try to be helpful. 🙂

    Name / username: Clara
    Permission granted / over 11: Over 11
    Commenting with a valid email? Yep!

    I can’t wait! EEK!

    -Clara <3

    • Madi March 5, 2017 at 11:32 am - Reply

      YAY! That’s totally fine – thank you SO much for signing up and just reading what you can!! That means so much!

      So excited! Thank you so much again, Clara! I’ll be sending you an email ASAP. ?

  17. Rebekah March 5, 2017 at 7:13 pm - Reply

    I would love to be a beta reader, Madi!

    Name/Username: Rebekah
    Are you commenting with a valid email?: Yes, I am!

    Also, I have a sort of apology to make. I’ve actually read your novel before, though I wasn’t focusing on editing. I found the link on your doll blog in the “Helpful Links” section after making an invalid search, and I easily guessed the password. I LOVED IT SO MUCH I FINISHED IT ALL IN TWO DAYS!!! I was actually planning on doing the same thing, but I thought it wasn’t very honest and I would much rather help you edit, anyways. I know it was intrusive, I hope you don’t mind. 😀

    • Madi March 5, 2017 at 10:59 pm - Reply

      Yay! Thank you so much for signing up! Usually I’d recommend 11+ or asking permission but since you already read it that’s totally fine!

      LOL, you are a very good detective. XD I can’t believe you easily guessed the password (though it was kind of obvious XD) Aw, THANK YOU SO MUCH!! I’m so glad you liked it!! And I don’t mind at all! I knew they showed up in Helpful Links and I figured someone would find them and probably guess the password anyway haha. So that’s totally fine! I’m so glad you liked it and I’m so happy to have you as a beta reader! I’ll be sending you an email shortly. ?

    • Madi March 5, 2017 at 11:12 pm - Reply

      I sent the email – sorry there’s no subject! I don’t know what’s wrong with me today… I forgot to give the very link to the first chapter in the earliest beta reading info emails I sent out and then I totally forgot to put a subject on yours. XD 😛

      • Rebekah March 6, 2017 at 8:01 am - Reply

        Thank you so much for emailing me! And I’m so glad you don’t mind! Yeah, I was planning to ask my mom, but since I’ve already read it anyways…XD And that’s perfectly fine that there isn’t any subject; I knew what the email was about once I saw your name on it 🙂

        • Madi March 6, 2017 at 10:14 am - Reply

          LOL! XD I’m really glad to know you loved it – I was a little worried about the violence and had no idea what to suggest as an age limit! ? 😛 And phew! Glad got to you okay ?

          • Rebcake April 30, 2017 at 2:27 pm - Reply

            Hi Madi! Don’t want to be a bother, but could you possibly delete the comment in which I told you my age? My mom probably doesn’t want that all open to Internet stalkers. 😀 Or maybe you could edit it out?

            • Madi May 1, 2017 at 3:24 pm - Reply

              Of course! I edited out that part entirely.

  18. Daisy March 5, 2017 at 7:23 pm - Reply

    Name / username: Daisy (THE DRAGONCOLOGIST)
    Permission granted / over 11:…PERMISSION TO LAND GRANTED!
    Are you commenting with a valid email I can contact you by? YEP YEP.

    Sorry but I am a bit excited. Excuse the… screams.


    • Madi March 5, 2017 at 11:09 pm - Reply

      YAAY! Thanks for signing up, Daisy! I’M SO EXCITED TOO! Sending you and mail now. ?

  19. Lydia P. March 5, 2017 at 8:16 pm - Reply

    I wish I could help out (and read an awesome story), but my mother would kill me, lol! I am SOOO behind with literature… Sigh… It makes me really sad because I love reading and am pretty fast at it, but I was supposed to read A Tale of Two Cities in three weeks and Pride and Prejudice in two weeks, along with writing a paragraph on each of the 13 main characters… I’m supposed to be reading Silas Marner now and writing an essay on marriage, and I haven’t even finished Pride and Prejudice…
    Anyway, thanks for the opportunity, I would participate if I could!
    -Lydia P.

    • Madi March 5, 2017 at 11:15 pm - Reply

      Aw, that’s totally fine! Wishing you the best of luck on all of your reading and essays and everything! It means so much that you even want to sign up though – thank you so much, Lydia! Once again, best of luck with everything! ?

      • Lydia P. March 6, 2017 at 4:36 pm - Reply

        Thanks so much! So sorry for the rant, I really have no reason to complain. If I hadn’t of gone to the Georgia Ballet Sleeping Beauty with my mom and grandmother over the weekend I would’ve had time to catch up. It isn’t like I haven’t been doing anything fun! I just got a little carried away…
        Anyway, thanks for being so sweet!
        Hope you have a wonderful week!
        Blessings, Lydia P.

        • Madi March 6, 2017 at 4:39 pm - Reply

          You’re so welcome! LOL, that’s totally fine! Ooh, that sounds so cool! I’ve only seen one ballet (The Nutcracker) and I loved it. LOL!
          Awww, you’re welcome! Thank you! Same to you, Lydia! ?

  20. samanthadolls March 5, 2017 at 8:26 pm - Reply

    OOOOH! Yes, I will! I’m over 11, and my email is agdollawesome@gmail.com
    This will be so fun! BTW, I’m not sure if you know that I have my own personal blog, it would mean the world if you followed!

    • Madi March 5, 2017 at 11:18 pm - Reply

      YAAAY! Thank you so much, Sam! Sending you an email now!
      Ooh! I think I’ve heard about it but never checked it out! I just have to ask before visiting but once I do I’ll totally follow. ?

  21. Daisy March 5, 2017 at 9:46 pm - Reply

    Will you be adding it to goodreads? I’d like to count it as one of my books read this year.

    • Madi March 5, 2017 at 11:56 pm - Reply

      I’m not sure… I’m actually not even exactly sure what goodreads is, haha.

  22. Daisymermaid March 6, 2017 at 10:36 am - Reply

    Can I pop in and read the now-edited version?
    Name: Blue
    Permission granted/over 11: I am over 11, and I read the first draft, right?! ?
    Are you commenting with a valid email I can contact you by?: Not at the moment, but I can if you need to. But my PM inbox is always open (and besides, if it’s the same password as before you probably don’t need to, right?)

    • Madi March 6, 2017 at 10:42 am - Reply

      Why, yes, yes you can! I would LOVE it if you would! ? And yeah, if you read the first draft and weren’t bothered by anything at all, you’re good. XD
      Nah, I don’t need to. I’ll just send the link to your PM inbox right now. And how did you guess… am I seriously that bad at making passwords… ? Yes, it’s the same password as last time haha. ?

  23. Josie March 6, 2017 at 11:29 am - Reply

    Congratulations, Madi! I’m so excited! 100k+ words is a great place to be at. I’d love to beta read for you! I’m with you on the God-honoring part. Even when my stories aren’t about God directly, I always try to make them God-honoring.
    Name / username: Josie (Beth)
    Permission granted / over 11: 13
    Are you commenting with a valid email I can contact you by? Yes.

    • Madi March 6, 2017 at 11:30 am - Reply

      Oh my goodness, thank you so much! I’m SO honored you want to beta read! 😀 I’m just ahemfranticallyahem turning my BIBPC entry in and then I’ll send you an email right away – thank you so much again!

      • Josie March 6, 2017 at 1:06 pm - Reply

        Wait, is the deadline today? *screams internally* Sounds good.

        • Madi March 6, 2017 at 1:32 pm - Reply

          It was 12 PM. But my extra-points thing was four minutes late so all of my internal screaming might’ve been for nothing. ?

  24. Sara????? March 6, 2017 at 12:15 pm - Reply

    I still can’t get over how good you did on it!! hahaha how are you ?

    • Madi March 6, 2017 at 12:22 pm - Reply

      (HAHA I love the emojis in your name XD) Awww, thanks! You’re so sweet! I’m amazing, how are you?

  25. Kathleen March 6, 2017 at 1:13 pm - Reply

    Wow, Madi, congratulations! 122k is amazing! I don’t think I can beta-read, but good luck and I hope to read it when it is published. Plot holes are terrible! Sorry you ran into those, they’re difficult to work out. And while many people say that you shouldn’t edit before you finish your first draft, go with whatever works for you. Some people will get too caught up in the editing and never finish, which is why that’s a common suggestion.

    (Hi, by the way. It’s been forever since I last commented.)

    – Kathleen

    • Madi March 6, 2017 at 1:39 pm - Reply

      Thank you SO much, Kathleen! Aw, no problem and thank you so much again! Ugh, yes. Since the time I published this post I actually discovered eight more. ? Ohh, okay. Thanks so much for telling me that. I’m going to see what works best for me. ?

      (LOL! It’s so good to hear from you! If you ever wanna talk over email you can reach me at madigrace[at]powerofGOD[dot]com)

      • Kathleen March 9, 2017 at 12:00 pm - Reply

        🙂 You’re welcome!
        Oh, goodness. That sounds terrible! I hate plot holes. Especially when you’ve already finished the first draft!
        No problem! Do you read goteenwriters.blogspot.com? It’s a really good writing blog.

        (Good to hear from you, too. Okay, thank you.)


        • Madi March 10, 2017 at 9:30 pm - Reply

          Bleh, it was! ? But I’m being very meticulous in plotting out book II so I can make it as plot hole-free as possible. 😛

          I’ve heard of that, but I don’t currently read it! It sounds really neat. I’ll have to check it out sometime!

          • Kathleen March 11, 2017 at 10:29 am - Reply

            Oh, I hope that goes well, then. I can’t plot to save my life, so it’s good that you can.

            Yes, it’s great! I follow a whole lot of writing blogs, if you ever need any.


            • Madi March 11, 2017 at 12:21 pm - Reply

              LOL, thanks! Plotting is definitely, er, interesting. ?

              Ooh, awesome! Thanks so much! ?

  26. M&M March 6, 2017 at 5:19 pm - Reply

    AAAHHHHHHH! YEEEEESSSSS!! Madi! I LOVE your stories! And I wish I could sign up for beta…..but I cant..:(

    Are you allowing people to read your book? if they are not on beta??


    • Madi March 6, 2017 at 5:21 pm - Reply


      The only difference between reading and beta reading would be giving suggestions / edits if you were a beta reader. Is that what you cannot do or is it the fact that I would need to email you the password and chapter link?

      • M&M March 11, 2017 at 12:02 pm - Reply

        I think emailing would work better. sorry for the trouble 🙁


        • Madi March 11, 2017 at 12:23 pm - Reply

          No problem! So would you like to sign up for beta reading?

  27. Mia March 6, 2017 at 5:50 pm - Reply

    Name / username: Mia
    Permission granted / over 11: Yup, I’m 13
    Are you commenting with a valid email I can contact you by? Yup

    • Madi March 6, 2017 at 5:56 pm - Reply

      Awesome! Thank you so much for signing up, Mia! I’m emailing you now.

  28. sara?☺???????????? March 6, 2017 at 8:32 pm - Reply

    Hey madison!

    ya I know I like the omojis in my name to hahaha

    I am great busy still Doing homework *ugh* haha

    I can’t wait to see you!!!
    when I come back in about 2-3 months haha

    • Madi March 7, 2017 at 11:56 am - Reply

      Haha, yeah, homework XD Can’t wait to see you, too!

  29. Joy March 6, 2017 at 9:17 pm - Reply

    Hi! Congratulations on this great accomplishment! I would love to beta read your book! My username is Joy, I am over the age of eleven, and I have permission to read this book. Also, could you check out my American girl doll blog? It is from my doll Emily’s perspective. Thanks a million!

    Serving Him in song – Joy

    • Madi March 6, 2017 at 9:19 pm - Reply

      Hey, Joy! Thank you so much for signing! I’ll be sending you an email shortly!

      I’d love to check out your blog! Visiting it ASAP! ?

  30. Megan March 7, 2017 at 9:31 am - Reply

    Okay… *deep breath*
    CAN I DO IT? XD It looks like so much fun! I’ll try to work my way through the whole thing, but it might take me a while. 😀

    • Madi March 7, 2017 at 12:01 pm - Reply

      YES! I’d love for you to do it! *happy dance* That’s totally fine! You do have until May 1st, so there’s no rush. ? Sending you an email ASAP!

  31. sara ?????? March 7, 2017 at 1:36 pm - Reply

    Hey madison!???
    have a great day!!?
    how are you today???

    • Madi March 7, 2017 at 8:46 pm - Reply

      Hey, Sara!

      You, too!

      I’m great! How are you?

  32. sara March 7, 2017 at 9:55 pm - Reply

    Hey madison!
    again you just rhymed that’s funny

    Hey sara,

    You, too

    I’m great how are you?

    haha ttyl!

    • Madi March 8, 2017 at 12:56 pm - Reply

      LOL! I’m a poet and I didn’t know it. ?

  33. Phoenix March 8, 2017 at 1:14 pm - Reply

    ***Makes mental note to ask my parents if I can read it*** ???

    • Madi March 8, 2017 at 1:23 pm - Reply

      LOL! I hope you can! ?

      • Madi March 8, 2017 at 1:24 pm - Reply

        It’s also totally fine if they’d like to read some / all of it first, too. 🙂

  34. SARA!!!!!???? March 8, 2017 at 3:10 pm - Reply


    • Madi March 10, 2017 at 9:21 pm - Reply

      LOL! ? You, too!

  35. Kendall March 8, 2017 at 10:06 pm - Reply

    Madi! Yay!
    I would love to beta read for you, so here is my form! 🙂
    Name: Kendall
    Yes, I am over 11
    My email is ‘contactable’, though I am pretty bad (really bad) about checking it. 🙂 Maybe I can reform during this process, though. 😉

    • Madi March 10, 2017 at 9:29 pm - Reply

      Yay! Thank you so very much for signing up, Kendall! I’ll be sending an email to you ASAP.

    • Madi March 11, 2017 at 12:27 pm - Reply

      I just sent you an email! Hope it gets to you OK.

  36. LizFromAGH March 10, 2017 at 10:01 am - Reply

    awww! Thanks for that mention! I had so much fun!!!!!! I can’t wait for you to publish it!! I hope by Christmas so i can buy copies to give as gifts!!

    • Madi March 11, 2017 at 12:19 pm - Reply

      Aw, you’re so welcome! And I’m SO glad you enjoyed it! That means SO much!! Thank you SO much, Liz!! 😀 😀

  37. Lydia Dyslin March 11, 2017 at 2:32 pm - Reply

    Okay, I didn’t read the first draft. Life got in the way . . . I’m so sorry! XD But I am determined to read this novel I’ve heard so much about besides the first two chapters. 😛 Sign me up! (My name is Lydia, I have permission to read it, and I’m using an email you can contact me by :D)

    ~Lydia~ <3

    • Madi March 11, 2017 at 2:49 pm - Reply

      LOLOL! That’s totally okay! XD YAY! Thank you so much! I’ll send you an email ASAP!

  38. May Everly March 13, 2017 at 9:51 pm - Reply


    1) OMG CONGRATS I’M SO PROUD OF YOU AND READING YOUR AMAZING ACCOMPLISHMENTS MAKES ME WANT TO ACCOMPLISH SOMETHING TOO. XD But honestly, that is such an amazing thing to have done, to complete a novel! YAYAYAY

    2) I would TOTALLY beta read, but 1) school and Camp NaNo in April wouldn’t permit me to read your novel by Apr. 31 and 2) I’m not Christian so while I am fine with little mentions of Christianity and honoring God (I totally respect that), LOTS of it has the possibility of making me uncomfortable and going against some of my beliefs. 🙂 But jsyk, I think it’s so cool that this is about Japanese culture??? #DIVERSITY

    3) Okay I’ll stop now so I can read your other post and comment on it. 😉

    • Madi March 16, 2017 at 7:21 pm - Reply


      Ahem. THANK YOU SO MUCH! That seriously means so much! THANK YOU! 😀

      Oh, no problem at all! I totally understand! I’m so glad you came and followed, I LOVE reading your comments! Thanks so much again, May! 😀

  39. Elise March 14, 2017 at 7:19 pm - Reply

    That is awesome Madi! I love the concept, and I sincerely wish that more books like yours were being publish. You are a true blooming author! Please go ahead and sing me up! My name is Elise, and I am 11 nearly 12, have permission to read it and yes, I am commenting with a valid email address which you can use to reach me! 🙂 3

    • Madi March 16, 2017 at 7:38 pm - Reply

      Thank you so much, Elise! Your words mean so much! I am so happy you want to beta read! I’ll be sending you an email ASAP! 😀

  40. Elise March 17, 2017 at 11:46 am - Reply

    🙂 Thank you so much! And I am very excited to get started! 🙂 <3

    • Madi March 18, 2017 at 2:14 pm - Reply

      You’re so welcome! I’m so glad! 😀

  41. Light4theLord March 18, 2017 at 8:41 am - Reply

    Ohmygoodness! THat looks insanely interesting!!!! 🙂 I’d LOVE to be a beta reader! You know how old I am. 🙂
    ~ Light4theLord

    • Madi March 18, 2017 at 2:17 pm - Reply

      Aw, I’m SO glad it looks interesting! And YAY! I’ll send you the email ASAP! Thanks so much!! 😀

  42. Anonymous March 18, 2017 at 12:12 pm - Reply

    I was wondering if you knew that Ari is a male Middle Eastern name, and Xiang-Su is a mock Chinese name. Will Ari have roots from these areas?

    • Madi March 18, 2017 at 2:26 pm - Reply

      Ari is actually a westerner though born in Japan, and her name can be a both male and female name meaning “lion” “eagle” or “brave.” While the name was generally male, it was uncommon for male first names. I chose it for my character because her name sounded feminine and I liked the meaning. Her parents moved to Japan as missionaries and took on a new last name of their own invention. 😉

      • Madi October 26, 2017 at 2:15 pm - Reply

        Okay, yeah, never mind. I’m totally having to change her last name, it’s Chinese. XD

  43. Manta (aka ElsaIcySnowflake) March 18, 2017 at 12:27 pm - Reply

    Hi Madi!:) I’d love to be a beta-reader for you, and yes, as you know, I am over 11, lol.;)
    One thing to remember is that you will ALWAYS find a plot hole on a reread. Know why? Because it’s YOUR story-verse and YOU know the most about it. You’ll think there is something missing when there isn’t. I do this all the time. If you mention every detail of every incident your story will be a million words long when it should be a hundred thousand. Reread the scene again. Is the “plot hole” REALLY a plot hole, or is it just a missing detail that isn’t really needed to tell the story? (Look at Frozen. Disney never explains where Elsa’s powers came from. Plot hole, yes, but we don’t need that information to tell the story. Should it be addressed in an extended story? Sure! I did! But it doesn’t need to be in an hour-and-a-half animated movie, either.)
    And of course, if it really is a plot hole, use the SIMPLEST explanation. Chances are it will fit in better.:) (To use the Frozen-verse again, because that is what I write a lot, my explanation is that Elsa’s powers are from some kind of recessive gene that runs in her family. Bam, done. We don’t need anything else like the planets lining up nonsense that I think is supposed to be official.Too complicated and quite honestly makes no sense to me:P)

    Good grief, I am so wordy, I’m sorry:P 🙂

    • Madi March 18, 2017 at 2:28 pm - Reply

      Yay! Thank you so much! I’ll be sending you an email ASAP!

      And thank you SO much! I was so worried on when I would ever stop finding plot holes. I could just see a super technical person reading my book and rolling their eyes at its inaccuracy or legitimacy and go “What about ()? And what happened to ()? And how did ()?” XD Thank you so much! 😀 😀

  44. Manta (aka ElsaIcySnowflake) March 18, 2017 at 12:30 pm - Reply

    Oh, and sorry for the double comment, but whoever told you not to edit while you’re writing your first draft…uh, sorry, but that is ridiculous. Edit away! I ALWAYS do. That way you can change plot points if necessary without having to rewrite a ton of stuff later.:)

    • Madi March 18, 2017 at 2:29 pm - Reply

      Thank you so much! I’m still trying to find what works best for me in the way of that. XD That does make a lot of sense! 😀

  45. girly blogger March 19, 2017 at 6:18 am - Reply

    would love to read your novel! SO EXCITED FOR YOU!1!!
    name:jana username: girly blogger. yes, i’m over 11, yes, i’m commenting with a valid email you can contact me with. AHHHHHH can’t wait to start reading it!!
    xx girly blogger

    • Madi March 20, 2017 at 9:59 pm - Reply

      YAY! Thank you so much! I just sent the email to you. Thank you SO much again! 😀

  46. Daisy A. Paquet March 19, 2017 at 4:01 pm - Reply

    You know, by the way, for most people, that ‘no editing until finished’ rule works. But for some of us…

    Yeah, we go back and edit once in a while during writing BECAUSE LOOK. There are no rules in writing. None. At all. Other than: Save what you write and: write what God tells you and also: have fun.

    It’s not really a ‘rules’ thing. Except there should be a rule against cliche bad guys being done terribly… XD

    • Madi March 20, 2017 at 9:51 pm - Reply

      Thanks so much! I feel so much better knowing that! *inner editor squirms to be free* XD

      Haha… yeahhh… XD

  47. thegeckoonline March 29, 2017 at 1:36 am - Reply

    Hi, is there a special form I have to fill out instead of just putting my email in the comments? 🙂

    • Madi March 29, 2017 at 12:03 pm - Reply

      No, you don’t have to put your email in the comments at all! Just make sure that you’re commented with a valid one. 😀

  48. thegeckoonline March 29, 2017 at 5:42 pm - Reply

    Hi, I’m thegeckoonline and I am over 11, using an email that you can contact me by

    • Madi March 29, 2017 at 6:56 pm - Reply

      Thank you so much for signing up! I just sent you an email. 😀

  49. ginnie April 6, 2017 at 4:28 pm - Reply

    Hooray! I am so excited for you! I could totally feel your agony of the plot holes!! I am just about ready to edit the third novel in my trilogy, so believe me, I have been there, sister! 🙂 Also, I am a huge fan of books that are not dirty and lame. I would rather write clever, than vile and shocking any day. Here’s to following God’s plan, doing what we love, and kicking butt at it! 🙂 Cheers!

    ginnie / http://www.fakingitmostly.com

    • Madi April 6, 2017 at 9:13 pm - Reply

      Thank you sooo much, Ginnie! Oh my, I’m glad someone knows how I feel, haha! And me, too — God-honoring and well-written is so much better than dirty material! Thank you SO much for commenting, Ginnie! Amen! ?

  50. Josie April 6, 2017 at 5:35 pm - Reply

    “funny, childish name-calling battle” Ariki! (I think I’m a comment stalker now O_O)

  51. Danielle June 8, 2017 at 2:28 pm - Reply

    Agh, I regret not signing up for the beta reading.

  52. Ali September 1, 2017 at 11:56 am - Reply

    your face when plot twist LOL
    aww man wish I hadn’t missed this! I bet your novel is awesome!
    (and so is that cover, not corny at all.)
    Is your book for sale? is it finished? sorry about the questions but I love your storys and I am so excited you are writing a novel. I’m writing a book too! (nothing bad in it at all.) I have a lot of work to do on it though. I’m so happy for you though! have a nice day!

    • Madi October 26, 2017 at 3:27 pm - Reply

      Oh my goodness, so sorry I didn’t see this until just now!

      LOL, I like that meme. XD

      Aww, thank you SO much, Ali! You’re so sweet!

      It’s in the process of rewriting it right now, but I do plan to publish it soon! AWWW, that means so much! You’re so amazing, Alie! Ooh, best of luck with writing your book! I bet it’s amazing!

  53. […] so surprisingly easy with these three methods I’ve discovered in writing To the Death, Hora: Everything I Never Said, and working on my scene outline. They might assist you in kicking […]

  54. […] you part of the poor group that beta-read the third draft of Loyalty Book I back in March and April? I hope to God you were […]

Enjoyed the post? Let me know! Just hit "like" above and leave a comment below.

%d bloggers like this: